Wake up a full hour before I'm supposed to. Get dressed. Watch a movie, since I have time. Have "American Girl" stuck in my head for the rest of the day. Get in car with Vomit's Mother. Proceed to get driven to school. Pray to God as Lumina swerves in and out of lanes. There were no blinkers. Thomas Edison would be disappointed in mankind. Step onto school property. Talk to pothead friend Charlie. Listen to extremely racist song about Mexican Americans before Gracie arrives. It is 7:50 AM.
Kelsie has arranged (somewhat awkwardly, seeing how it was lucky I checked my e-mail at 10 the night before) for we to meet her sister and mother in the front of the school to retrieve her campaign posters. Gracie and I exit school building. We see van that may belong to Kelsie's mother. Approach cautiously unless we are incorrect in our assumptions. "Yell out Kelsie's name," Gracie says. "KELSIE!" I yell, prompting stares. The van jumps to life. I am handed a stack of papers, tape, and a note saying something to the effect of "Thanks and keep your hands off of the Billy Currington poster in my locker, even if you do know the combination." Walk away, feeling slightly like I just participated in a drug deal. It is 7:55 AM.
Mr. TreasurerPoser approaches. "I'll wear your sticker today if you wear mine tomorrow." As I'm not to be in school tomorrow, I saw no problem with this deal. I intend to still wear his sticker. I just don't know what good it'll do him. Is that evil?
Walk miles and miles in Geography due to (and there really is no better way to put this) fire drill plan created by a group of mentally challenged people. Get told class before us is group of assholes (by our teacher). Get cranberry grape juice. Die on the spot. Go to NAVY jet simulation. Laugh the entire time, because two men behind me intend to play "Touch His Penis and Get Yelled at." Giggle. Almost vomit. Rest of day is a blur due to jet-induced headache. I remember somewhere in there discussing Jane Eyre and Mr. Rochester's sex life. And my own. But that's about it. Oh, and I'm at my grandmother's house right now. And skipping tomorrow. Yeah.
Aren't you glad I summarize so fantastically?
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