"my homies"

We did end up hanging out, which was cool. Mostly all we did was go book hunting and watch television, and I had to work on the bookshelf a little bit, but I love my friends.

I'm already excited about our Potter Party! Gah, I wish we could have a billion of those. But that would take too much time, you're right.
"That's not all that's new this year."
*Snicker*


But the bookshelf is finished, and I am amazed that we fit all of our movies on it. I gotta respect my parents, though. That shelf is made to hold 300 movies. It's 30 movies short of full.

Like, DAMN.

I've been pretty much dragging ass today. I think I might just go finish my book, then watch Shrek 3 (because Chance was sweet enough to rent it for me).

Peace, yo.

>>And a Happy Thanksgiving to you all<<

la casa

So this house was built incredibly weird. In the kitchen leading out to the garden room, there's a window, because the garden room was added on. It was a really ugly window, too.

One day, as I was stacking movies on top of eachother on our old bookshelves, I thought a thought. "If we take out those windows, we could build a bookshelf." And so I told my dad about it, and we talked about it.

One night in September, I said, "Hey, we should work on it over the break." So my dad got up and tore the windeows out. Easy as pie.
Unfortunately, we haven't had the money to actually build the shelf. So it's just been this big hole.

But yesterday...ah! Yesterday we could afford it! So we went to Lowe's and bought most of the wood, some stain, and some screws. I stained them last night (very poorly, I might add), and this morning we got up...

and now we're halfway towards a decent movie shelf! I'm excited. The only reason we couldn't finish is because we were short a board of wood, so we had to go back up to Lowe's today and buy that last piece. We have to wait a day, though, for the stain to dry, so we can't work on it until tom0rrow.

And then, when it's finished, I get to put up all of the movies. Alphabettically! I'm excited. (I really am).
Hopefully, though, I won't be doing it tomorrow, because I'll be hanging with my homies.

Ah!

ay dios mio

I'm sick. Ew. I'm gonna take some Nyquil and pass out in a minute.

Student teacher basketball game was fun. Students lost. What a shocker.

Got to see Kelsie. That was pretty awesome. I love my friends.

I got a perfect score on the GHSGT writing part. It's surprising that not everybody did.

I learned how to make popcorn today. I've decided that I hate popcorn.

We were told we're going to write a sequel to Peter Pan in Writer's Workshop. I've never actually seen Peter Pan.

It's really cold. May be why I'm sick.

I'm excited! It's the week off. Woot!

i love

to dance. There is nothing in this world more satisfying than a body moving, spazztastic dance.
Other than a nice hot shower.
And a tank full of gas.
And a good day's work.
And staying up all night reading a book because you just can't bear to put it down.
And waking up the next morning and rereading it for the hell of it.
And realizing that you're hated and you don't actually care.
And listening to Bridge over Troubled Water.
And finishing homework before 9 so I can watch House.
Oh wait! I should probably get to that..

i'm trying to think

http://www.myfoxatlanta.com/myfox/pages/News/Detail?contentId=4906814&version=5&locale=EN-US&layoutCode=TSTY&pageId=3.2.1

about what I was doing at 11:30 yesterday morning. Was I eating? Sleeping? Cooking? Helping my dad with the brakes? Does it matter if I was discovering the cure for cancer if White's dead?

That's five. Tory, Christian, Brooke, Shika, and now Joe.

I just want to hide under a rock.

I didn't always like Joe, but he always made us laugh. Last year he would make lunch a lot less boring. He was rude, lactose intolerant, loved to say fuck, loyal to his friends, very smart, and a good guy overall.

This one is the closest one yet. The other four I knew, but I never really associated with. But I definitely hung out with Joe.

Beatlemania

About 40 years too late. Oh well.

This

is ridiculous. Ugh. Idiots.
"But when you talk about destruction, don't you know that you can count me out?"

I got 3 shirts at Kmart for $10. And they look nice, too. Score.

My dad's Jeep is LAME.

I was supposed to go to to the nursing home, but I had to back out. Gah.

I just need a new book to read. Something good. I can't wait until Christmas.

que the f

Okay. So it comes as no surprise that I've always been fortunate enough to have good grades. So fortunate, in fact, that I've been comforted by the fact that if I just chose not to do something, I'd still be good.


NOT ANYMORE!

Now, if you don't turn your work in, you get SILENT LUNCH. What are we, in the fourth grade? But no, if you don't turn it in or get a zero on something, you have to go to silent lunch until you DO finish your work. And the teachers have to grade it and give you up to a 50 on it. That's just ridiculous.

I haven't really felt the burn, since I've always done my work. But I decided that I didn't really want to do that Spanish homeowork, because we did the exact same thing last year, and wouldn't it be awesome if I just skipped Spanish all together? But then I woke up in the morning and realized, "Hey. You'll be stuck in silent lunch for this." So I did it. Angrily, I might add.

The school has just gotten incredibly ridiculous. I would go to DHS if it weren't for the fact that every other week someone brings a hit list to school. I'm not in the district for WHS. Mr. Crappy Principal Guy is just such an asshat.
Keep to the right of the halls.
No congregating in the hallways or you'll get a referral.
If you break the dress code you will be sent to OSS.
Boys not wearing a belt will be forced to wear a yellow string around their pants.
You cannot have any demonic face paint (i.e., ghosts, vampires) for Halloween.
No hats on Hat Day.
If you want a dance, you just gotta abide by a few rules. And by a few, I mean 106.
Let me just tell you that I am Oh So Proud of you guys. Wait, what was that name again?



Oy with the bullshit already!

GHP

I MADE IT!

I was going around saying I did a bad job at my interview. I THOUGHT I did a bad job at my interview. Apparently.

I'm excited that I made it to state. But it took me a while to get there. I thought for sure Gracie or Meaghen would get it. And Kelsie, now that I know she didn't make it either. I just don't understand it.

I haven't actually been able to talk about this part, because I'm always around this girl. But I cannot believe that Sarah was pissed at me. She was crying because she didn't make it. And she wouldn't talk to the people that did make it. What a bitch. She even said when she got out of her interview, "Well, that's shit." I mean, if I hadn't gotten it, I would have been fine with it. I was 100% shocked. I was just excited about getting free cookies. Honestly. Nobody seems to understand that. But Sarah? Sarah acted like it wouldn't effect her, then started crying over it.

Whatever. I'm over other people's anger issues.

*Hey, Kelsie, if you see Sra Chinn, could you tell her I made it please? See you tomorrow!

100 things revisited

I was looking through some old posts and thought, Man, I've only changed a little bit. So I'll just post about it. 100 things style.

1. Empire Records is my favorite movie, simply for the line "Don't get your fingerprints on them, you're going to wreck them. That's why they call them records."
2. I like E.E. Cummings because he confuses the hell out of me but it's all so sweet.
3. I watch a kid's show called Hip Hop Harry in the mornings. And I wish I could join the Hip Hop Harry Dance Circle.
4. I like to dance, even though I'm not good at it.
5. I say I'm not good at a lot of things, even things that I'm decent at.
6. I don't even know why I do that.
7. I miss Kelsie horribly.
8. I forgot Kirstie's middle name.
9. I dreamt one night I *ahemed* with that one guy.
10. When I was two or three, I was dancing on my parents' bed, and a lamp with no shade fell onto my arm.
11. I can't feel anything where that burn mark still is.
12. I have another burn mark from chemistry last year, and I'm very proud of it.
13. I think I would miss my cyst if I ever got rid of it.
14. My favorite book is NOT Gone With The Wind. I actually haven't read that book in years. My favorite book is Pants on Fire by Meg Cabot because it leaves a lot to the imagination.
15. I always thought S. Morgenstern was real and I hated William Goldman for his stupid little additions (which, even now that I know the truth, are ridiculous. Way to ruin the suspense, there).
16. I think I bombed my interview, but at the same time I'm hoping I didn't actually and by some miracle I make it to State.
17. I've applied for 8 jobs. Haven't heard back from any of them.
18. I look up Moulin Rouge songs on Youtube.
19. In the fourth grade, on our way to Tybee Island, Kieya let me listen to her MP3 player with her, and we listened to the same song for about 2 hours. I didn't notice it until I said, "Is Advanced for Press some kind of rap group?"
20. I really only like a few Pink Floyd songs. "Wish you Were Here" is my favorite.
21. I love to write, but I can never think of anything good enough.
22. I don't go back and reread anything I write until I'm forced to.
23. I really like green, but since it was my mom's, friend's, and brother's favorite color, I said I liked red instead. But now it's my favorite color.
24. I've thought I was dead three times in my life.
25. I used to hurt myself.
26. I got over it.
27. I used to write bad poetry.
28. I didn't get over it. But now I don't willfully write poetry, so there's a difference.
29. I haven't drinken at all this year (excluding New Year's).
30. Around St. Patrick's day, I went to my brother's apartment, and I would have gotten drunk if my dad hadn't made me promise not to drink beforehand.
31. To this day, I have never tasted Rum. Nor do I ever desire to.
32. I almost tried pot once, but chickened out.
33. My dad thinks I sneak out of the house and have rabbit sex. I've never even held a guy's hand.
34. I truly love my teachers, because all of them are looking out for me.
35. I try not to lord it over anybody, but I love being number 2 in the class.
36. I'll be crushed if I'm not valedictorian.
37. I'll be crushed if I don't get into Brown or Duke. Or worse, if I get in but can't get a scholarship to go there.
38. I haven't actually researched these colleges (or any college really).
39. They sound good enough.
40. I sing when I wash the dishes.
41. When I'm really excited, I jump up and down and squeal and wave my hands around.
42. I do that when I'm scared, too.
43. And paranoid.
44. Lately, I've either been really really angry or really really happy.
45. I hate being that extreme, but I can't help it.
46. I have a horrible way of dealing with anger.
47. I sit in my room under a blanket and think about other things. Occasionally, I think back to what's making me angry. When whatever that is doesn't make me want to cry in anger, and I'm all numbed out, I can face whatever it is.
48. I told the GHP interiewer that I hated the Golden Compass. I liked parts of it, though.
49. I think I will fail at life because I live in this make believe world.
50. It's stupid that even though I realize this, I'm not going to change it.
51. Nothing truly horrible has ever happened to me (that I remember).
52. Sometimes I dream about what it'd be like if I were paralyzed.
53. Once I had a dream I was dead and talking to my aunt.
54. I truly lament the fact that I only have two blood relatives outside of my nuclear family.
55. I feel awkward telling my friends I love them, because they never say it to me.
56. In the seventh grade, I went to kiss Kelsie and Chynna on the cheeks, and they got freaked out. Now I just don't bother with anything.
57. I am sick to death of talking about Harry Potter.
58. Especially since the ending of the seventh one was so incredibly cheesy.
59. I got into an argument with someone because I'm areligious.
60. Then I got into another argument with someone because I believe in God.
61. Sometimes I feel like Chris D. doesn't even like me.
62. I've only asked two guys out. They both said no.
63. I once told my parents that I was going to Gracie's, and I went to the park and laid on the grass.
64. I watched Striptease when I was 9 years old with Kirstie and Katie R.
65. I would get to school at 7:30 even if I didn't have a zero period.
66. I hate it that some of the people in Writer's Workshop can't write.
67. I get embarrassed when I'm complimented and turn beet red.
68. If I read the book first then watch the movie, I hate the movie.
69. If I watch the movie first then read the book, I think that they're both good (or bad).
70. I can't stand my glasses.
71. Sometimes it creeps up on me that I'm probably going to go blind and I get panicked.
72. I can drive at night, but it really hurts me eyes and I'm scared the entire time.
73. I can't even read things unless I'm looking at them straight on.
74. I begrudge everyone else their eyesight.
75. I always paint my toenails and then forget to ever take them off.
76. I have a girl crush on Liv Tyler.
77. That once scene in Armegeddon where Ben Affleck proposes to her just melts my heart.
78. I would love to be a writer, but I don't think it will happen, which make me sad that we don't live in a world where we can be who we want to be.
79. I don't know if I'd be a good mother.
80. I love little kids. I love anyone under 10. Then I get nervous when I'm around them.
81. At the Trunk or Treat thing, I was in front of a moon bounce thing, and I had to help little kids take their shoes off. They were so adorable.
82. Sometimes I think about just randomly being a waitress, because then maybe I'd get over my fear of talking to strangers.
83. I haven't seen Granny in over a year.
84. I feel guilty because I wish she would die and be out of her misery.
85. She was the one who loved me, too.
86. Singing saves me.
87. My dad says I can't even sing that well.
88. I know some people get jealous of me because of my grades, and I know they'd be shocked if I told them how I wish we could trade lives and I could not be so...me.
89. I hated Laura's Halloween party, though getting to see Laura was cool.
90. I think maybe I'll try to see her some other time.
91. I feel blessed with my family, but I know we don't love eachother like we should.
92. What I mean to say is, I know they don't feel blessed.
93. I'm not supporting my mom's I haven't smoked campaign, because I know she's lying.
94. I used to think it would make a difference if I did support her. It didn't.
95. I was proud when the lady carded me at Blockbuster when I went to rent an R rated movie.
96. I don't understand the phrase "You want to have your cake and eat it too." What's so wrong with having a cake and eating it? Better than wasting it.
97. I used to hate pickles on anything. Now I ask for extra pickles (no onions).
98. I love Papa Dan, even though I don't think he loves me.
99. I think I'm the type of person who loves so much they can't function around people they don't love.
100. I want to go to Italy, New York, Hawaii, France, Australia, and Montana: in that order.

i wanna hold your hand

I know I've posted about this before. I was just thinking about that post earlier. About how it's okay to hold a child's hand, but not a friend's. Not a stranger's. Yes, a lover's. A husband's. Not a teacher's. Not a classmate who needs help.

I was thinking about that earlier. I know someone who is going through such a hard time right now. But I am terrible with these kinds of things. I always say the wrong thing, and so most of the time I just sit in silence, waiting for them to ask for help that I am more than ready to give. But they don't ask. Eventually, they pull themselves together. Or they don't. Either way, they don't need you.

I just wanted to reach out and hold his hand.

sleeping

has become difficult for me. It's now 3 in the morning. What is wrong with me?

I mean, I WAS asleep. I fell asleep at 8:30 with the lights on and my jeans and a quilt. And I kept doing that thing where you keep waking up because you're hot/lights are in your eyes, but you're too lazy to do anything about it. So about an hour ago, I actually DID do something about it, and now I keep thinking about my crap GHP interview.

Sleeping for me this week has not been good. I think I might just take some Nyquil and try to pass out, even though I'm waking up in three hours. But three hours is better than..now.

Maybe I'll just hold off on that Nyquil until tomorrow night, because I for definite need to sleep more than six hours.