another once in a month post in which i catch up

Here goes:

I went to the midnight premiere of Twilight with a lot of friends. Kelsie, Gracie, and I wore matching shirts that said Twilighter on the front and "Edward Cullen...I want that" on the back. After that I got a tattoo of interlocking infinities around my wrist. It hurt like a son of a bitch, but I like it. Then Thanksgiving, the school. Just a bunch of the same, really.

I saw Australia. Everyone kept talking about how it was so Gone With the Wind, which made me want to reread that. The older I get, the more I understand these characters, so that's fun.

Let's see...I turned in my UGA Fellows application, which is a scholarship that pretty much covers full tuition (along with HOPE) and gives me study abroad money. And, you know, I got accepted into UGA. And Oglethorpe. I'm just now finishing my application for...another school. I don't want to say it, but I know I probably won't get in. I just wanted to see if I could.

That's about it. Finals are this week. I've got my hardest three, the ones that are going to take the entire allotted time to take, on the first day, and then the easiest three, which will take, combined, thirty minutes, the next day. But it'll all be over soon.

I feel bad, though. I spent all of the money I had on the tattoo. I have done zero Christmas shopping. None. And it's really kinda lame.

Hopefully, with the break coming up, I'll be able to post more.

Until then.

oy vey

Life has been busy, to say the least. I saw Daniel Tosh. He was freaking hilarious. But that wasn't all that I've done this past month (obviously).

I voted. Heck yes I did. I'm not going to say who I voted for, because it's a wee bit personal, but it was fun, nonetheless. I felt all important and whatnot, walking up to that little computer screen. I'm definitely voting in this run-off election. Yep yep.

My writing has taken a turn for the worse. The assignments I've been given have all been structured, and I've forgotten what it's like to just...write. Write whatever I think, I suppose. I've been having some interesting dreams, so I think I can do it. I've just got to find the TIME.

So far this week, I've had mountains of Calculus homework, various meetings/practices, a nine page Spanish book to write, and various other things that took up too much time. I've developed this system where I ignore the stuff as long as I can (as long as it takes for me to start freaking out that I haven't done my homework yet). I haven't done my homework for tonight, yet, if that means anything.

I promise myself that I will have my UGA Fellows application done TOMORROW. If not, then looks like I'm not ever going to college.

Oy vey. There's just too much. Too, too much.

counting down

Why do I let so much time pass between posts? I guess I've become accostomed to not writing whenever I feel like I need to, so that could be it. Anyway.

My brother's mom died. That's been...worrying. I know that my brother loved his mother very much, even if they didn't have the best of relationships. I worry about him and Kirstie.

Calculus is kicking my ass. I feel like crying every time I get into the classroom. It's ridiculous.

Writer's workshop isn't fun. Ms. Mitchell used to talk to us, but now that there're more people in there, she doesn't do that. It used to be my favorite class, but now it's edging on least favorite. :(

Actually, truthfully, all my classes are my least favorite. School is my least favorite. How about that? But it's good. I will survive and all that.

Applying for colleges. Very time consuming. And they make me think about stuff, which I don't like to do.

So I guess that's about it for recent events.

This Friday is The Secret Lives of Bees, which was an amazing book.
Next Friday is Daniel Tosh.

Very exciting.

okay, okay

Sorry. I honestly tried to log on, but everytime it said there was some kind of error. I finally caved in and asked Joey what it was. And in two minutes, he fixes it. Figures.

I actually let out a squeal of joy when it let me log on. I have been starved for a place to outlet. My writing has drifted off, which, I can tell you , is not so good for someone taking three classes in which writing is helpful (one of which is AP Spanish).

That's another thing. School started back. Not exactly the funnest thing in the world. I've got senior-itis in the worst way. Fortunately, my ability to do well is not dependent on my interest, so my grades are pretty good. And I'm trying to almost apply for college. It's a bit long and incredibly expensive, though, so it's taking time.

Almost got a tattoo, but I didn't have the money by the time my 18th birthday came around. Sarah got one, though, and it's really cute. We had a joint birthday party over the break. A lime green jello pool was on the menu. I learned a lot of things about jello that I would not normally have thought of. Like, it burns when it gets in your eyes. And it tints your skin (my toenails are still green for some reason, though it was a few days ago). Kelsie made me this amazing cake in the form of a Jeopardy! scoreboard, which was German chocolate and absolutely delicious. She is just so talented.

I discovered that I love Waffle House hashbrowns a certain way, which is with peppers, mushrooms, and tomatoes. And I like vanilla coke more than cherry coke. And Mr. Pibb is not as good as Dr. Pepper. I am what is classified as a "good" nerd.

Someone in my class is going to be on a certain MTV television show. He wants to be a ladies' man. Of course, with a camera following him around all the time, all the ladies that he wants follow him around anyway. You would think that it would defeat the purpose, but I guess it seems to be working.

I believe the last time I posted was June-ish, and there's just too much to catch up on.

I read Breaking Dawn in one sitting. Stood up all night, went to the midnight release (which was fun, but not, like, the best thing that's ever happened to me. One woman looked out with disdain on anyone who had not been to Forks, WA, which was everyone except for her). I drank four red bulls, and it worked until Saturday, when I was so tired I thought I would throw up. If I recall correctly, that was the weekend before school started, and I still had not finished my summer work. So that was fun. But I did LOVE Breaking Dawn. Stephenie Meyer is such a talented writer. Then I went on to read The Host, which was good in a completely different way. Then, miracle of all miracles, she released Midnight Sun online, which I forsook my Calculus homework for. It was pretty amazing, and I loved it.

Since then, I think I've read about 20 Linda Howard novels. I am addicted to romance novels, I think. But, you know, I'm reading it for the plot. :)

The Dark Knight was really good. But where did the pencil go?
Mamma Mia, I think, was even better, but I'm a sucker for musicals. If Two-Face had sung a song about his interior matching his exterior, maybe it would be on par. But it's not. I saw it the first time with Kelsie and Gracie, and it was a pretty fun day. We had quite a few movie days this summer, and I always had fun. Movies are pretty amazing.

Next week is homecoming week, and I have to think of dress up days. Itll be fun.

I want to just write and write and write, but I am too incredibly tired, and I need to do some major studying.

So, I'm sorry for the whole two of you who have been remiss without my rantings. I will return this time, now that the problem has been located.

Adios.

man

it's been a while.

I haven't posted anything about anything lately. I guess I just havent had the inclination.

Let's see. So far, I've retaken the SAT and taken the ACT. I'm not going to take either of them again, because they are entirely too long. Plus, administrators are completely incompetent.

Hmm, so other than that...I hung out with Kelsie and Gracie and watched the Other Boleyn Girl, which was sad/disturbing. I also saw Jumper, and I have to say, Hayden Christiansan (sp?) is hot. I would definitely not mind that. Ahhh.

Yeah. Monday I invited Sarah over. She got to get a lot off of her chest, which was really good for her, I think. We took her with us to PC, and even though Partners was closed, we had a good time. We went to Carrabba's instead. Best. Meal. Ever. I LOVE scallops, and they just so happened to have the most delicious scallops I've ever tasted in my entire life. Mmm, mmm good.

I've been reading/rereading a lot of things. I love reading an interesting book for the first time, because I just focus on it and can't put it down. I stay in bed until I've finished it. its great.

Tomorrow we're supposed to all go see the Hulk. I can't decide whether I think it looks lame or good. I guess we'll see. I got bored earlier and looked up movie spoilers for The Happening (which looked good, but sounds really lame), The Strangers (eh), and Made of Honor (I was just curious how it ended). Yeah. I've been that bored.

Lately I've been having these wicked bad headaches that only seem to get worse in the water. Which sucks, because I really like to swim, at least for a while unil it gets boring :)

Gah, my eyes are so tired. Probably because I woke up every hour on the hour last night and finally just stayed awake at 5:30 since I had to wake up at 6:30 anyway and knew I wouldn't be able to sleep for much longer. A bit of good came from that, since I got to watch Pirates of the Carribbean (the first one- I don't have the third one and the second one sucked).

I'm excited about seeing Dark Knight and Mamma Mia! They look like pretty good movies.

I have three novels to read and I only really want to read one. One of the I could read and just be done with it if I only had the book. The other one, Invisible Man, is incredibly boring and overly symbolic. And it's not even like The Scarlet Letter where if you cut out the symbolism it was sort of interesting. If you cut out the symbolism, it would still be a horrible story. But the other one is 1984, which is pretty interesting. I just read Brave New World, and it seems already to have similar points.

Chris is moving back home. He needs to save his money. That should be hard, considering this entire family has an extreme problem with self control (concerning food and money). Speaking of which, there's a picture of me on the school website in my white dress when I wasn't paying attention. I look like a giant white balloon. Great.

Hmm. I suppose that's all that I can think of right now. I've been trying to write a story, but it's hard because of our computer situation. I'm writing on Chris's old laptop right now, and it's not exactly the most private of mediums.

Oh, and I'm looking for a job. It's hard, because I am incredibly shy, and it's difficult for me to just walk up in front of other people and ask for a job. But, a girl's gotta do what a girl's gotta do. Senior dues, cap and gown, senior trip, senior portraits...the wonderfulness of being a senior, I suppose, will eat at expenses. So that'll be fun, I'm sure.

Mmm. Bye.

so...

summer is here. And I'm already bored.

Saw Sex and the City. Very good. I cried. Not like, little tears that stuck in my eyes, but rolling down the cheek and soaking my t shirt tears. Oh yeah. Then I read the first chapter of Breaking Dawn. And I've watched that "scene" of the movie. Very nice.

Other than that...kaputz. Random projects have already begun. I cleaned out my notebooks. I could clean out my closet, but that will take an enormous amount of effort. And lately I've just been so tired. No creative juices flowing. Nothing. Nada. Zip.

And now I have to pee for the thousandth time. Tomorrow should be fun. Going to school. What I've always wanted to do. Oh yeah.

seniority

Haha! School is officially out! I'm pretty excited.

Why, though, does it seem as if I'm always on my period when school's over, so I can't go to the pool? And even then, why does it always seem to rain that first week? Ridiculous.

Graduation was fun. I really enjoyed seeing all of my friends, and I know I'm going to miss them next year.

I need a job. And to actually study for the SAT. And decide what college I'm going to. Very confusing.

Ah. It feels like this is my last summer of freedom. It's exciting.

i'm nervous

I have to be in a white dress today because I'm an Honor Marshall, which means that I'm in the top percent of my class (which I already knew). I'm nervous. It fits a little tight, and I'm having to hold my breath a bit to sit here and type. I don't know if I'll be able to make it through this entire ceremony. Plus, I'm wearing a little black half jacket that goes really well with the dress. I hope they don't make me take it off, though, because I would feel really self conscious.

I haven't posted in a long time, and for that, I'm sorry. It seems lately I just haven't had the time.

My parent's anniversary was Friday and they're celebrating it today. I'm happy for them.

I've seen Iron Man (excellent), Speed Racer (also excellent) and Prince Caspian (ABSOLUTELY AMAZING!!). I wish, though, that Prince Caspian had hooked up with Susan. Like, instead of just one lousy kiss. Gah.

I feel super busy now, even though the next two weeks of school are going to be cake, considering the fact that I'm in a bunch of junior-senior classes, and it's the seniors' last week. It makes me excited about next year, but also nervous.

Okay. So that's my life. I need to go sit in a cool room, because for some reason, I feel like I'm about to faint. That can't possibly be good.

prom

was fun. I danced, oh yes. I popped it, I locked it, and I dropped it.

I had a good time. My hair was done up in about 60 bobby pins and two cans of hairspray. The purple matched the silver very well. The pictures looked amazing. Good food afterwards. Good fun after fcod. Bad sleep after all that, but I can just sleep later.


Good stuff.

my spring break

I spent the entire break doing the following:

Being really hot.
Sneezing.
Avoiding writing two writer's workshop assignments, a Spanish essay, and APUSH homework.
Being avoided by my friends for some reason.
Worrying about my car.
Buying prom dress accessories (all silver-it goes with my purple sparkly dress).
Playing video games.
Reading.
Watching TV.
Eating too much out of boredom.

On the plus side, I did write another bitter diatribe that I thought was pretty hilarious. I can't exactly show it to anyone, but it's still funny.

Hmm.

le smarts

Okay, so my mom is pre-diabetic, which is different in that she thinks she can drink again, but not different in that she still only eats rice cakes. Go figure.

I'm going to retake the SAT (and I'm going to take the ACT, so that'll be fun).

What I really wanted to talk about was the fact that I'm smart. No, I'm not bragging. It's like bragging that you're left-handed or really tall. I see something, I remember it. Now, in the case of Chemistry or Trig, I don't remember how to use it, but I remember it. Plus, since I have no social life, I read a lot and watch way too much television, so I remember all of that info. I can't help that. I am so sick of people saying that I'm just so much smarter than them. Not that I disagree with a lot of them. But it's not fun for me to brag about, because I didn't really earn anything. And it seems to be the only thing I get complimented on, which is lame.

Sigh.

Well, last week, prom fair was a bust. Nobody showed up. And all that day I had worn a suit, which was really hot, and a funny hat for 1920s day. The pep rally ended waaaay too early, so people were restless. Pie in the face went well, but we didn't get a lot of money from it.

T.I. came to our school Friday. He said it was because we were the top school on the list that would most appreciate it. i.e., we're the most ghetto and more than half of the school would listen to every word that he said (and not make fun of it, as the rest of the student population was doing).

Busy busy, but spring break now.

le sigh

I didn't make it.

Plus, also, my mom has Diabetes.

Plus, also, I bombed the math portion of the SAT.

Plus, also, I failed a chem test.

Plus, also, I have GHSGT all next week.

Plus, also, my Trig teacher is insane so we have a test in her class Monday and Tuesday, directly after another mind-numbing three hour test.

Plus, also, I have to pie Ms. Archer, an overall sweet lady though a little Umbridge-like, in the face.

Plus, also, it's at the pep rally that I have to run on Friday.
The same Friday I have to wear a suit to sixth period.
The same Friday I have to go home and change into black jeans and a white shirt for prom fair.

But maybe next week will be better.

i'm just so tired

Every day this week when I've been getting home from school I've been taking a nap. I just can't seem to function anymore. Gah.

I've got so much stuff on my mind at night, though, that I don't get to sleep until way late. Which is probably why I've been taking naps.

Gar.

Somebody told me that I looked like crap on Friday. Not that I asked her too, or anything. She just did. And then did that incredibly annoying thing where she acted like SHE was getting attacked when I asked her what she meant by that. She drives me up a wall. Like she has any right to tell other people that they look like crap when she still goes around with huge bows in her hair? Gar again.

I just really need to sleep.

cathedrals

If I'm salutatorian, my speech will most definitely include knock-knock jokes, Richard Nixon, and E.E. Cummings. I've just decided that.

I'm waiting for the end of the month. I would like very much to go to GHP or to know that I'm not going, that I actually am a failure. I would like ver much to know what I made on the SAT. I would like very much for prom fair to be over. I would like very much for the pep rally to be done. I would like very much for the GHSGT to be past.



I would like that very much, indeed.

hmph

First of all, happy March!

Second of all, I hate that I had to start the month off with such a long and boring test. Gah. Why can't they just let you take the test straight through? If they'd done that, I would have beat the traffic leaving the place and gotten home an hour earlier! Lame.

Ah. So that's been my day so far. I went to get some Krystal on my way back. I feel like I did okay on it, I guess, but you never can tell with that kind of stuff.

Okay then.

this week

So this week was mid-winter break. I had a ton of fun, and I don't think I even went out. Well, okay, Monday I went to see Atonement with Gracie. But I got to the movies all the time, so that barely counts. And I've been trying to contact Kelsie in some way so we can hang out, but either she doesn't answer/respond or has to go like, immediately. So I've pretty much been flying solo this week.

It started on Friday. See, I thought I was off to a good start when we actually had a good time in English. But I got home and there was a letter saying I FAILED me Science GHSGT pretest thing. And I couldn't say, "What the hell is this I know I aced this because it was exactly the same as last year," because, duh, no school. So that kinda put me in a sour mood.

But I got over it. I went into cleaning mode. I think I always do during the February break. Got rid of half of my closet, organized my sewing box, rearranged my room. Oh, that alst part was real fun, especially when last night I realized that I positioned my bed underneath the giant leak in the roof. So after shifting my bed a little, I realized I liked my room the way it was before, and re-rearranged it. At least I got some wicked exercise out of it, let me tell you.

Oh, I went through a few days where I cut up my old magazines and made collages. I ended up making four: poster sized, two cardboard, and one mini-poster. So that was interesting.

SAT is in less that a week. I'm kind of nervous. That's probably because I have such high expectations. I'm supposed to get the results back the day I find out about GHP. So that'll be a fun day. Hopefully.

Went to my grandmother's. We went shopping and I got a cute little summer-y dress, some new jeans (which I desperately needed), and Eclipse. And then I read Eclipse like, a thousand times. So that was fun. She gave me an old crossword puzzle book, so I've been working on that a lot. Started reading Anna Karannina (sp?) and Lolita. Then I stopped. So...eh.

Going back to my drippy room with my beautiful rose.

no more

I decided that I'm going to carry around a notebook. I'm thinking that I should start examining what goes on around me. Or in my free time, I should focus on writing as opposed to reading. I wrote down a few of my ideas and some of my lame haikus.

Plus, also, I think it's living a bit dangerously. I mean, here I am with this notebook that anybody could pick up and read, anybody could just know what I'm thinking about.

I guess it's not that different from this, really. I suspect that my family reads this, though they've never actually mentioned it to me. But who knows? I'm still going to say what I need to say. It's like when you were a little kid and you'd open your eyes during prayer, and some other kid would tell on you. But they saw you, which means that their eyes were open, too. The point being that telling would tell on yourself.

So there's that.

it happens

The SAT Gods decided to send me to another school to take the exam. Lames. But that's pretty much the worst part of my day, so that's good.

Went to see Juno with Kelsie, Gracie, and Hannah. It was...interesting. And sad. Even some of the previews made me tear up a little, so I kinda figured I was in for a doozy. Then we went to Southlake. Ate lunch. Looked for dresses. Gracie tried on two that looked really good, Kelsie tried on one that looked...weird (though I think she could pull it off) and another that looked pretty cute, if a little tight around the bodonkadonk. I didn't find anything, since stores like that don't tend to carry my size (eh). I'm still waiting to find a dress that truly dazzles me, though. Anyway. We kinda started to wander around aimlessly, so we left Southlake and went to Barnes and Noble. I bought Blood and Chocolate, so that was cool. Then we went home, and I was tired.

I read Blood and Chocolate a little earlier. It was really good. I liked the movie, but it was hardly anything like the book, except for names and the fact that they were werewolves. Ah. I just wished I didn't read so fast sometimes, because now I'm back to being bored. Not that I don't have my pick of classic literature. :)

Ah. So that was fun.

growing up

is hard to do.

Sigh.

The SAT. I don't want to do it. But I signed up for it. Is that a good idea? I should probably have some idea of what it's about before I take it. Study for it or something like that.

School is lame. What else is new? Registration was today. I'm taking AP Physics over AP Spanish, which makes me sad. I wanted to take Spanish. Sigh.

I guess that's just what you have to do, though.

dearest, darling paper

The interview was okay. I think I did fine. 33% shot of making it, so I suppose those are somewhat decent odds. 1 out of every 3 people at the interview place will make it. Will I be one of them? Who knows? I really hope so. I'm just so proud that I made it this far.

It started off with me waking up at about 5:30 (1 minute before my alarm clock went off...how weird is that?). Then I got dressed up in my suit and whatnot, looked over my criteria and somehow managed to get my dad out of the house by 6:30 (because I am obsessed with being early, the place was an hour away, and it started at 7:50). But we had to stop at the post office to mail my SAT registration form. And then my dad wanted to get breakfast. And then we missed the turn. And then we got lost at the school, which even though it was built in the BC era, had TWO buildings, and of course, we went to the wrong one, first. So we ended up making it with only 5 minutes to spare, so that was handy.

I checked in, then they got a group of about 15 or 20 people and put us in a very cold room to write an essay in. I wrote a letter from a black pen to a white piece of paper about the connection they had made and the racial tensions that separated them. Eh. I tried to make it funny. Then they shuffled us to a reading room where we read about 6 or 7 passages. After that, I was on my own. I interviewed with two nice-ish ladies (and we only talked a little bit about the reading, so it was a waste of time). I think I made an ass of myself, but I hope it's okay anyway. And then...I was done. After about an hour and a half, me and dad headed home.

And the rest of the day has just been me sitting around watching the first two seasons of Buffy. I have some serious BO and my hair is gross, but I just haven't had the initiative to do anything. My clothes are scattered all over the floor, and don't even get me started on my reading assignment. I think that because I've been overachieving all week that I just needed to underachieve. Hopefully, it's only a day-long thing, because my head is killing me.

I think I'm going to head off to bed, now. I don't find out about whether or not I made it all the way until March 28, which is just before Spring Break. Ah, it never seemed so far away.

But I do think it would be an awesome experience. You know, Susanna has been so disappointed with her English education since she got back from GHP...but I'd like that. Kinda like, I was at the top of the mountain once, and it was astounding. Now I'm back down here, and it's horrible...but I'm glad I saw what it could be like.

oh the cleverness of me

So today would not be one of those good days. I was humiliated, degraded, and starved all day. Plus, I'll have to go back and do it tomorrow.

I'm not comfortable in my own skin. I don't know if I ever really have been. Maybe that's one of my problems. And it's not even that, most of the time. I don't usually think about the fact that I'm not really the prettiest girl around or that I wear incredibly thick glasses, because that doesn't really tell anybody who I am. I think about what a klutz I am or how I can't ever seem to say the right thing.

And then today was just...I can't talk to people. I realized that. Why don't I have one of those cool relationships where I don't feel bad about calling someone and just crying, even if it might sound stupid? I just let people talk to me about themselves. Of course, for most of them, that's all they ever talk about anyway, but still.

My eyes are just so old.

it's the same old story

So. This week's been...crazy.

Wednesday I skipped to work on my English "project." I didn't finish, but I made a lot of headway. About the time I would have gotten out of school, it started snowing. It was crazy awesome, but it melted before school on Thursday, so we had to go. Lame. I got saddled with a bunch of makeup work which I still haven't done yet.

Friday, I went to school, but we left by 9:00 for the Beta Club Convention in Atlanta. It was exciting, just being there. None of my crowd actually went to the convention, though, so I was a little stranded most of the time. I was fine by myself. I can be a solitary person. I just don't like to know I'm totally alone. There's that difference there.

I participated in the Creative Writing competition. Something about a man who didn't wear matching socks. I know I didn't win because the topic threw me and I just wrote a bunch of crap. Ah, well. The session was fun. Clint told the most hilarious story ever..."The metal was bent, and it looked like a heart, except it was upside down. So it's like it was saying, 'I love you, Clint, but not really.'" I stayed a while in Kelsie's room, then went back up to my own. Barely slept that night since my roommates were so incredibly loud. Ugh.

Then Saturday morning it started to snow, and the superintedent called to cancel all school activities. So we Stockbridge people packed up all of our bags and were ready to go in half an hour. Then, out of nowhere, the Woodland people needed to hitch a ride back with us. So we had to wait for a fucking HOUR for them to get their shit together. I was so angry. Then some of them expected to be let off before us. Pssh. Okay, sorry Kelsie, I know it's not your fault. But I can't help it, either.

So we got home and it was snowing, and I wanted to eat but my mom promised to get me some food. Yeah, it only took her two and a half hours. So I was cranky. And they kept asking, "What's wrong?" which made me even angrier. I just retreated to my room and busted out the iPod (by the way, I have GOT to get the iHome base thing. Those things are beastly awesome).

And then today I went to see Atonement (which I absolutely loved) and then ate at Olive Garden. So pretty good day. I'm going to do all of my work tomorrow, so that'll be good.

Interspersed with all of that is Chance being incredibly psychotic. I really don't know what they expect. They tell him that if someone else throws the first punch, it's okay for him to hit them back. So you know what he does? He PROVOKES the other person. It's not just accidental. He seriously goads them into hitting him so he can beat their ass. Crazyness, that's what it is. I'm worried about him, but at the same time, it's not fair. He beats up his best friend, and my mom does the dishes for him. After I did the dishes for HIM when he was sick. So he hasn't done the dishes in a long time. Which is definitely not the point in the strike.

Ugh, I have to register for the SAT soon. And my GHP interview is next week.

OH!! I forgot. The hotel we were staying at for the convention....Barack Obama was there! I didn't believe it at first, but when we got out of the first session, there were guys with earwhigs all OVER the place. And on the elevator, someone said, "I heard Barack Obama's at this hotel," and a guy with an earwhig kind of looked around (to assess the danger of the person, I think) and said, "You're wrong," and just went back to looking around the hotel from the elevator.


Heh. Exciting.

ha!

It is definitely snowing outside. I hope it's enough to get us out of school tomorrow.


It's just so wonderful. A warm Christmas break and a snowy school month!



Yay!

verbal constipation

It's not pretty. I know it. Constipation of the mouth. Where no matter what you do, you just can't seem to get out what you need to when you need to. You keep quiet in important situations where your voice could really help, and someone suffers because of it. Plus, it's just a really gross sounding name.

Fortunately (or possibly probably unfortunately), I'm not suffering from verbal constipation. I seem to have contracted the diseases exact opposite.

I can't shut up.

More specifically, I can't stop saying things that are unnecessary/mean/hurtful/stupid. I try. I really do. I hold it in, I think about an alternative thing to say, I even took some Pepto Bismal. Nothing seems to work. "What is with that ugly baseball cap you're wearing?" "Why on Earth did you think I'd appreciate a blue necklace?" And my personal favorite: "Nobody even likes Linkin Park," a statement that sent a certain pre-pubescent to his or her room crying.

Is there some kind of medication or something that should help?




On a sidenote, I'm also suffering from PTOS. Yes, it's true. I have Putting Things Off Syndrome. But we call it Pee Toss for short. I should be working on my Huck Finn project, because I know I'm not going to have time next weekend....but I'm sure as hell not about to start.

nyuk

Feeling agitated. No clue why. Very rebellious all of the sudden. Won't do what I'm told to do and all that jazz. Feeling like a failure. That's cool, though. These things come and go. A little bit.

School is...school. Not much there. Huckleberry Finn is a weird ass name. And a long book. Ew.

Chance got into a fight at school. Some black kid kept calling him a cracker, and when Chance didn't respond, the kid said, "That's what I though," and poked him in the back. Chance went off on the kid. I guess it's okay. It sucks that he's not being even a little bit punished for it, though.

I think the problem is that I'm getting a big head. Los padres care about my grades, think they're good, everybody says I could get into a great school. I didn't used to agree with them. I used to think, maybe, but probably not. But now I'm starting to think it's possible. And now I'm getting full of myself. I just need to slow it down and fail at something to bring me back. Like that's going to be difficult.

Okay, so I guess those is me thoughts. Love love.

words

I've been trying to get my write on, but it's been difficult. I'll think of a great idea and then mess up the name and it just ruins the whole story. Ick.

Having fun with my iPod. Learned how to import CDs. Oh so much fun. I'll probably be up all night doing this mess. Me gusta.

farararara

I realized that I haven't actually posted anything of substance lately, so here goes:

Christmas Eve, Chance spent the night in my room and I woke up every hour because HE wouldn't shutup. Then we officially woke up at 7 (Chance woke the parents, I got Joey), then we opened presents. Everyone was fairly happy (I got my iPod, so that was awesome), and Dad started working on the wicked cool puzzle I got him that had like, 30 different city scapes on it. We finished it before the New Year, but he broke it when he tried gluing it to the posterboard, and then he just put it all back in the box. It was a shame, because it was so pretty. My mom got Braves Monopoly, which she loves. Joe and Chris got cash. Chance got a bunch of stuff and two cd players, one of which he has already broken. Sometime over the break I bought myself a black leather chair at Goodwill for $15. I like it.

I watched Meet the Robinsons, which was absolutely adorable. Predictable, but it was such a good concept. Also watched Peter Pan, which is such a sweet movie. They kinda cheaped together the "alternate ending", though, because you could see wires and blue screens.

Let's see, what else? Last Friday was the Potter Party, where we mostly talked through the first 3, then watched the 4th and 5th ones. Chrisie wouldn't shut the hell up and I wanted to bean her upside the head. I ate too much and got sick. But it was fun. Kelsie got me Big Boned, and I read that in one morning, because it was fantastic.

New Year's...I drank like, two beers. At midnight, Joe and Drew went outside and lit these gigantic fireworks. Then, later, they went up to Drew's house and someone called the cops on them and made them break all of their fireworks. Heh heh. But New Year's Day, we went to Bee's and ate Partner's with a bunch of people who are supposedly related to me but whom I always forget. I got $50 and a bunch of weird gifts (like a teddy bear calendar), and Joey called at about 3 to tell us he was super sick, so we rushed home. It's that same thing he had last time, and it hurts my heart to see him writhing in pain like that, but that boy will tear your head off for anything, so I stay away.

I stepped so close to the heater last night it burned my favorite long pair of pajama pants. :(

Okay. So, that's that. Starting to feel a little sick myself, but hopefully I can get over that before tomorrow. Mexican food just isn't the same if you can't taste it. No clue why, though.

happy

new year!